Strings of My Solitude
A man can be himself only so long as he is alone and if he does not love solitude. he will not 'love freedom, for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.
Arthur Schopenhauer
Solitude is not a space, it's a feeling, which you can't explain literally. It's the hole In your chest that makes your heart cripple with ache. It's what I see as I look into the mirror. Solitude is what makes me move backwards - one step at a time - away from everyone around me, away from who I once used to be. It traps me and engulfs me completely.
It makes me wonder every day if I am good enough; if I'II ever be good enough. This solitary feeling has taken away a million things from me, and as much as I regret this, I let it. I let the loneliness overtake, I let it overshadow me, take advantage of my depleting self-esteem and throw me away in a cage of solitude. But I wish I was better than this. I wish I had the courage to break free from these bars of pessimism .
But most days, I don't even know who I am - putting on facades as I meet people trying hard with all my strength to blend in. How did I let It get to me, I wonder? And innumerable thoughts cross my mind. It's becoming difficult with each day to fathom my existence, to believe in my being and let go of these strings that tie me to my solitude .
The photograph in this project describes me as a person, and my journey of discovering myself. Every image is a metaphor to my solitude. It's all connected through a string between me, and the solitude I'm trapped inside. Keeping up with a world that is built on a pile of lies and disguises is not easy. This project is looking about who I am' and an expression of my deep dilemmas of my mind.
Soumya Ranjan Satapathy | BFA Photography 2016-19
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